We're going to need a bigger vehicle...

...because we can't safely fit 3 car seats into the back of our Corolla...

We'd LOVE to get something like this:


It's WAY out of our price range, but a girl can dream, right? Realistically, we'll probably get an older, used van, but still safe and reliable.

But yes, we're having another baby! Baby #3 is due late September. I'll be 9 weeks along on Saturday.

This...was and wasn't a surprise. It was in the fact that we weren't officially planning to try until May. But at the same time, it wasn't.

Back in December, John asked me when I wanted to try for another baby. He said he was thinking January. At the time, I felt ok with that. And then I had the distinct impression that we'd get pregnant with a little girl in January.

But then, as January approached, I...panicked. Totally freaked out about the idea of having 3 kids, about having to buy a van with zero money, about the fact that I'm still nursing Hyrum and wanted a break between nursing and pregnancy, about fitting another baby into our tiny 2 bedroom apartment, about my ability to be a good mother to another child...I pretty much let my fears and apprehension get the best of me.

And so I decided I wanted to wait...

Obviously Heavenly Father had something else in mind. I don't fully comprehend His timing with this, but I know everything will work out. Somehow. I'm trying not to let myself doubt and fear. It's challenging, though.

Especially about the whole no money thing. At least we have clothing for either gender and we already have pretty much all the baby gear we need. We only need a bigger car...which, of course, isn't exactly a small purchase.

Emma insists that it's a girl and that her name is Cinderella. Hahaha, no. We do think it's a girl, but there is no way I'm naming my child Cinderella.

Although...we also thought Hyrum would be a girl...and he very clearly isn't. So we'll see. Either way, we've got all the clothing and blankets etc.

Thankfully, I haven't been nearly as sick this time. With my first 2, I had awful awful "morning" sickness. I threw up so much. I even made a chart with Emma...I know, nerdy beyond the extreme. With Hyrum, I had to be on zofran up till 30 weeks. Miracle drug, seriously. Loved it. But it's not cheap.

But this time? Hardly anything. I feel a little nauseous now and then, but it's NOTHING compared to what I dealt with before. I haven't thrown up at all. I've had some issues the other direction, which is annoying for sure, but I'd rather deal with that than throwing up. When I do feel a little sick, I eat something and lay down until I feel better. I almost threw up yesterday, but only because Hyrum choked on a Cheez-it and threw up on me.

I really think the main reason I'm not as sick this time is because I no longer have a gallbladder. I am 100% convinced that is why it's much better this time. The whole zofran till 30 weeks last time was mostly because my gallbladder was failing and we didn't know it. We were oblivious until I wound up in the ER last March and had surgery within an hour of my bloodwork coming back...

I have to eat like ALL the time. It's irritating. And of course, I can only eat whatever my body dictates at that time. Which of course means 3 AM cravings for white cheddar Cheez-its...when we didn't have any. Or Sunday night cravings for strawberry ice cream. Torture, I tell you. Torture.

I hope the whole eating all the time will improve when Hyrum fully weans. He's currently down to 2 nursings a day (morning and bedtime). I plan to cut the morning one out soon. I hope weaning will improve my non-existent energy levels as well.

I've been beyond exhausted. My poor house is a total disaster. I haven't had the energy to clean for...um...too long. I don't even want to know. It's seriously disgusting. If anyone is interested in doing a service project...

No really, I mean it. I have no shame in accepting cleaning help. Just sayin...

I have my first appointment on March 1st. It's not going to be a fun one, though. Pap, internal ultrasound, bloodwork...yuck. I am excited to see the baby and hear the heartbeat, but internals are not exactly pleasant. It'll be good.

And I'm hungry again. Time to find something I can stomach eating. It's amazing I haven't gained any weight with how frequently I have to eat. And the foods I can stand aren't exactly the healthiest of choices.

Haha, and Hyrum just found the Cheez-its. Um, no. Don't want him to choke on them again. Time for food!